I can clearly admit that I am a ‘what if’ type of person. What if’s are a fun and intriguing way of looking at the world had different choices been made in contrast to the ones that did. Lately, a ‘what if’ has been fermenting within the boundaries of my brain that has intrigued me to no end- What if some of our favourite music of the past had never existed? That particular type of music that has had a definitive impact upon our lives such as a strong emotional attachment (a break up or a first kiss), a nostalgic moment of high school bliss, or a motivational occurrence that spoke to us in a deep and profound way. Music helps us to remember both quirky and meaningful instances from our past, but would we remember those occasions if that particular genre of music hadn’t existed?

Truthfully, there was a very good chance that some of our favourite songs (and bands, of course) would never have been heard. That is, if society didn’t have a say in the matter.

Allow me to explain.

Most of the music we grew up listening to stems from the popularity of other, similar sounding crusaders. Had it not been for one particular band or singer, we may have never had the privilege of discovering some of our most favourite melodies. Poignant moments of our lives could have been eviscerated from thought had it not been for particular songs from bands we continue to cherish as something special in our lives.

For instance, many are well aware that music labels are businesses like any other (Their first goal is always economical profitability). Nine times out of ten, labels will refuse to take a chance on a sound that is not in tune with what is currently popular on the radio. If a particular singer or band is hitting it big, the labels understand that there is money to be made. So they set about exploiting the sound of the hit maker by signing similar sounding singers or bands. This continues until that particular singer or band’s popularity begins to dry out as a result of market oversaturation.

But think about this reality for a second. If Nirvana and Pearl Jam hadn’t exploded onto the scene in 1991, would mainstream society have ever heard of Alice in Chains, Soundgarden, Stone Temple Pilots, and Collective Soul? You see, though they are talented in their own ways, these bands may have never cracked the mainstream music scene had there not been a surge in the search and discovery of new, similar sounding bands that could help the Grunge era profit-wise. The record companies clearly understood that there was a mass audience out there who would swallow anything they served them (as long as it encompassed self-loathing lyricism). So in essence, without the trendsetters, our listening ears may never had heard Soundgarden’s ‘Black Hole Sun’, or Alice in Chains’ ‘Man in the Box’, or Stone Temple Pilots’ ‘Plush’*. These songs would have more than likely remained part of the underground scene forever!

When I hear these songs, vivid recollections arise with the intensity of a John Bonham drum solo. Had Nirvana never materialized as a mainstream success, what would my personal memories of the early to mid 90s (song wise) consist of? This theory can be applied to almost every popular band, no matter the decade.

In the 70s, the emergence of Arena Rock** was intensifying with bands like Journey, Foreigner and Styx helping to popularize it. These acts helped to fully define the sound typified by arena rock, and as a result, paved the way for bands like REO Speedwagon*** and Whitesnake.

In the 90s, without Oasis and Blur, would we have ever heard of Pulp, Elastica, and Radiohead**** (and a few years later)-Travis, Coldplay, and Muse?

Without Rage Against the Machine and Faith No More, would the Nu-Metal***** movement have ever existed? Bands like Korn, Limp Bizkit and Slipknot may never have been heard (To some, this may have been a good thing). Just look at any musical movement and locate the trendsetter, and then look at the bands that emerged as a result******. If you think about it, a lot of bands success happens by chance. This is not insinuating that these bands are not talented, but mostly that they have garnered success as a result of being in the right place at the right time (or better, singing the right style of song at the right musical movement).

It’s bizarre to think that some of our most favourite songs may have never reached our ears had it not been for the success of something else previously. How would our musical world be different? What if the music of The Beatles and The Rolling Stones hadn’t resonated with society, but rather remained in obscurity? Through their influence, the general public has been privileged to so many great bands. Just think of how many musicians would have remained anonymous to the mainstream if it weren’t for these innovators?

Obviously this never happened, and the past cannot be changed. Things do happen for a reason. But think about this the next time you hear your favourite song: Rather than Radiohead’s ‘Fake Plastic Trees’, your most cherished song could have been ‘Boombastic’ by Shaggy. Hopefully for you, it wasn’t.

*Not to mention the rise of Alternative Rock (and its many influential bands) as a result of Grunge. Bands like Bush, Live, and Nine Inch Nails to name just a few. For more bands, just check out highlights of a Lollapalooza tour from the early 90s, which was originated by Jane’s Addiction frontman, Perry Farrell.

**Arena Rock is defined simply as a formula which encompasses slick, commercial material, underpinned by memorable hard rock riffs and a glossy production. Thanks to The Billboard Illustrated Encyclopedia of Music for the definition.

***Though popular in the 70s as a hard rock band, REO Speedwagon’s sound changed in the fall of 1980 with the release of their most commercially successful album, ‘Hi Infidelity’. The album was a stark change for the band as it tended to focus more on pop-oriented material.

****Though they did release their debut album, Pablo Honey, in 1993, their success didn’t skyrocket until after Britpop exploded onto the scene. At first they were considered just another member of the Grunge family (thanks to the success of the self-loathing ‘Creep’), but 1995’s The Bends and (especially) 1997’s OK Computer proved otherwise.

*****A combination of Heavy Metal, Grunge and Rap.

******Imagine the music that we may have never heard. On another note, think of the music that we were not privileged of hearing as a result of it not being popular at a particular time period.

The power of music is defined in its’ ability to help relocate faded memories once thought to have been forgotten (whether we like it or not). There have been countless moments in my life that would have remained adrift had it not been for the existence of a particular song that helped to define a moment in time.

1994 marked my introduction to high school life. The time where the choices I made would begin to have great impact on the man I would eventually become. To say that I was naive, impressionable and innocent as a fourteen year-old is an understatement. In fact, looking back at it now, I don’t think I realized how important high school was to me as an individual. It has taken me years of excessive contemplation to arrive at this conclusion*.

In retrospect, some of my most vivid memories are from high school. I am not intending to state that these memories are particularly positive or negative, but rather they are simply just memories. And as stated above, certain songs will trigger an illicit memory thought lost in the clouds.

Grade 9 is best remembered as post-grunge for me. Popular music was currently in the midst of a massive transition from grunge music to post-punk (or Pop Punk). Kurt Cobain was dead and so was the’ I Hate Myself’ movement. The bands I best remember from this grade were The Offspring (‘Come Out and Play’, ‘Self Esteem’, ‘Gotta Get Away’), Rancid (‘Salvation’)** and, of course, Green Day.

Conveniently, my first introduction to Green day occurred during music class. As I sat there silently in the second row with my alto saxophone awaiting the commencement of first period, I happened to look up and spot my buddy*** walk in with a shirt emblazoned with the words ‘Green Day’ and ‘Dookie’. I had no idea what Dookie was, but I was intrigued because my friend was always an influential trend setter in what music was ‘cool’ to listen to.

Green Day became everything to me in grade 9. To say that I was a moderately obsessed ‘basket case’ is fairly inaccurate commentary. In fact, I became so obsessed with Green Day in grade 9 that I decided my first act of rebellion would culminate with the alteration of my physical appearance. As I stated prior, I was highly impressionable (a child influenced by everything around him). Whatever spoke to me, I wanted to become. This adolescent behaviour led me to the decision of dying my hair blue to emulate these punk rockers from California****. This choice to dye my hair blue also led to the first outright lie my mother ever told me (that I can recall). She ‘honestly’ told me that my natural hair color would never grow back the same, and that it wasn’t worth it to do it. In my naive state, I believed her. What if I changed my mind and wanted to dye it back? It would be impossible as a result of my rash decision to become a troll doll. Suffice to say, I didn’t go through with it.

Looking back on it now, I’m definitely grateful that my mother prevented me from making a complete fool of myself. But, in another way, I’m saddened that she didn’t allow me to express myself in the way that I wanted to. In all honesty, my mother wanted to protect me for as long as she could, but there was no preventing the rebellion that grows within the hearts of teenagers. I would soon get my time.

Other notable bands/musicians/songs from grade 9 that impacted my musical understanding/appreciation were the Beastie Boys (‘Sabotage’, ‘Sure Shot’), Bush (‘Comedown’, ‘Glycerine’, ‘Machinehead’), The Cranberries (‘Ode to My Family’, ‘Zombie’), Live (‘I Alone’, ‘Lighting Crashes’, ‘Selling the Drama’), R.E.M. (‘Bang and Blame’, ‘Strange Currencies’, ‘What’s the Frequency, Kenneth?’), Stone Temple Pilots (‘Interstate Love Song’, ‘Vasoline’), Weezer (‘Buddy Holly’, ‘Say it Ain’t So’, ‘Undone-The Sweater Song’)

*And, of course, the countless teen movies that constantly reiterate this idea.

**Their mainstream hits, Ruby Soho’ and ‘Time Bomb’ would hit me the following year.

***The same friend that introduced me to Metallica and Michael Bolton!

****This choice came about after I watched a taping of their appearance at Woodstock 94 in which lead singer, (a blue haired) Billie Joe Armstrong, curiously ate a patch of mud on stage prior to the song ‘When I Come Around’ (Hey, a rock star can do that and look cool and inspirational simultaneously).

I can fearlessly proclaim that 1995 was the year that music had the greatest impact on my self-awareness as a developing adult. A particular musical movement began to arise in 94/95 that struck me like a thief in the night. It was a movement that established my musical tastes, and forever changed my musical appreciation. As a result, this era of the 90s and all it embodied continue to resonate deep within my soul. This was the time of BritPop.

Up until that fateful December afternoon of 95 when I arrived home from school and first witnessed Oasis’ ‘Wonderwall’ video, I had been all over the place with my musical tastes. I liked music from all genres, but nothing ever really stood out as something that would define me as an individual. I was still a huge supporter of Green Day*, but it was Oasis that got me to that next level**. I became passionately enthralled with them and every other band that emerged during this short period of time (like Blur, Elastica, Pulp, and Radiohead).

I have always been obsessed with British culture. From football and fashion to music and atmosphere, I have always been intrigued with the British lifestyle***. The music from this era took a hold of me, and the only reason I can think of as to why is because I was at my most mentally susceptible. Subconsciously, my mind and soul were seeking out possible solutions for my identity crisis (or lack thereof). Remember, for the very first time in my life, I was discovering who I was as an individual. I was setting out on my own and attempting to construct a distinct, identifiable persona. As a result, I was now beginning to confront issues, choices, and pressures I never would have imagined encountering. So basically, in my own nuanced way, I was finding myself through growth and adaptation to the surrounding world. And the BritPop movement**** became the soundtrack to my life at this crucial stage of my existence.

I’m pretty confident that THIS is the reason why 90s BritPop continues to hold a special place in my heart. I look at this and begin to comprehend music a little bit more. In my estimation, no matter how god-awful the music is, the movement that existed during your high school years will always be your favourite era of music. This is why your parents always seem to love the music of the 60s, 70s or 80s (depending on what time period they grew up in). It existed as they grew into adulthood. It was the soundtrack to THEIR lives. They look at 90s music and consider it trash because it doesn’t resonate with them as it does us. When I look at some of the music of today, I write it off as horrifically shallow. But for the teenagers currently intersecting with adult life, this is the soundtrack to THEIR lives. The present era of music will forever remain special in their hearts, and when they hear popular music in ten to fifteen years, they will simply write it off as forgettable because of its inability to capture the essence of their favourite era of music. This reality will forever be a continuously, repeating pattern.

For the next three years of high school, music would continue to play a key role in my perception of reality. Though much of the music was highly forgettable, it still had the tendency to resonate deeply. When I happen to hear songs on the radio from forgotten bands like Better Than Ezra, Gin Blossoms, Matchbox 20, The Mighty Mighty Bosstones, Savage Garden, Third Eye Blind, Tripping Daisy, and Toad the Wet Sprocket, I still conjure up vivid recreations of a life once led. When feeling lost, the songs of the 90s help me in rediscovering my center by reminding me of times forgotten.

To be honest, not all of my actions and decisions may have been motivated my music, but the sounds that emerged from this decade continue to reside within a special place of my heart. In fact, they always will!

Other memorable (no matter how awful they may be) bands/musicians/songs from the rest of my high school career that have not yet been mentioned are as follows:

Collective Soul (1994-1995) ‘Shine’, ‘Gel’, ‘The World I Know’

Pure (1994) ‘Anna is a Speed Freak’

Seven Mary Three (1994) ‘Cumbersome’

The Tragically Hip (1994-1998) ‘Grace, Too’, ‘Nautical Disaster’ ‘Scared’, ‘Ahead by a Century’,’ Gift Shop’, ‘Bobcaygeon’

Foo Fighters (1995-1999) ‘I’ll Stick Around’, ‘Monkey Wrench’, ‘Everlong’, ‘Learn to Fly’

Goo Goo Dolls (1995-1996) ‘Long Way Down’, ‘Name’, ‘Naked’,

Odds (1995) ‘Eat My Brain’, ‘Truth Untold’

Skee-lo (1995) ‘I Wish’

The Smashing Pumpkins (1995-1996) ‘Bullet with Butterfly Wings’, ‘1979’ ‘Tonight, Tonight’

311 (1995-1997) ‘All Mixed Up’, ‘Down’, ‘Beautiful Disaster’

I Mother Earth (1996) ‘One More Astronaut’

Aqua (1997-1998) ‘Barbie Girl’, ‘Doctor. Jones’, ‘Lollipop’ (Candyman)

Limp Bizkit (1997-1999) ‘Faith’, ‘Break Stuff’, ‘Nookie’

Matthew Good Band (1997) ‘Apparitions’, ‘Everything is Automatic’, ‘Indestructable’

The Verve (1997-1998) ‘Bittersweet Symphony’, ‘Lucky Man’, ‘Sonnet’

To be honest, there are far too many songs and artists from this decade of music to name in this piece. I apologize to The Chemical Brothers, Mase, Notorious B.I.G., Our Lady Peace, Rage Against the Machine, Semisonic, The Prodigy, TLC, Tupac, Veruca Salt, and the countless others who helped to define my journey through life.

*To this day, Insomniac, their 1995 follow-up album to Dookie, continues to pound the walls of my apartment with its poppy, aggressive sound

**It’s hard to explain to be honest-I don’t think I even realized it was happening. On another note, though their first album, Definitely Maybe (1994), is my favourite Oasis album, it is their follow-up, What’s the Story Morning Glory (1995), that truly made me into a fan.

***In fact, I achieved a lifelong dream of visiting England in 2009. I went backpacking through Europe for five weeks.

****In particular, Oasis, who continue to be my all-time favourite band. It still saddens me that they broke up in August of 2009.

Lately, I have become downright obsessed with the 1990s. I mean, I have driven down nostalgia lane so many times in the past little while that I sometimes find myself losing track of the present. If I were Lot’s wife, I wouldn’t be writing this; I would already be a grain of salt.

In all honesty, it’s sometimes dangerous to look back at the past. But in this circumstance, I don’t necessarily agree. As of late, I find myself revisiting many artefacts from the 1990s, the most notable being music. The music from the 1990s wasn’t necessarily the greatest. In fact, much of it was pretty terrible. But it was music that impacted me in a crucial way. I don’t think I realized it at the time, but the music from the 1990s was helping to form vivid, profound memories that would remain with me the rest of my life.

The Junior High Years

I first started really getting into music in 1992. R.E.M’s ‘Losing My Religion’ and the Red Hot Chili Peppers’ ‘Under the Bridge’ were the songs I most remember being played on the radio at this point (I wasn’t really getting the whole Nirvana thing just yet). My first recollection of the diverse nature of music that existed was discovered at my friends’ house. We were rooting through his CD collection, and I was asking him questions pertaining to his particular tastes in music.

Me: “What’s this black album?”

Friend: “That’s Metallica’s ‘The Black Album’”

Me: “What’s a Metallica?”

Though I wasn’t meaning to be humorous, I was still readily identifying myself as a musicology virgin. To assist me with my affliction, he told me he was going to play the album, and within one song, my introduction to Metallica was complete*. As an innocent, naive adolescent, ‘Enter Sandman’ was the heaviest song I had ever heard up until that point.

As we continued to scour through his CD’s, I would constantly ask him, ‘What’s this?’ The answers varied. That’s R.E.M.’s Out of Time, Tom Cochrane’s Mad, Mad World (‘Life is a Highway’ is still a great cruising tune), Michael Bolton’s Time, Love and Tenderness (for a moment, in my naive state of age, Michael Bolton was cool). But it wasn’t until I discovered Guns n’ Roses Use Your Illusion 1 and 2 that my musical obsession began.

I had heard of Guns n’ Roses prior to that (My friend would blast their debut album, Appetite for Destruction, all the time). But I guess I just didn’t get it back then. It’s when my friend made me a mix tape of both albums (Use Your Illusion-Side A, Use Your Illusion 2-Side B) that my connection with the rebelliousness of rock n’ roll began to accelerate.

In 1992 I was in grade 7, and prior to school one day I decided to listen to a song on my walkman (I had not yet listened to the albums). The first song hit me like a Ron Artest meet and greet with fans. Growing up with a religious background, I wasn’t sure what to make out of ‘Right Next Door to Hell’. I knew I SHOULDN’T like it.

I only had the chance to listen to one song since I had to run off to school. Sadly, it became the only song I heard on that mix tape.
When I arrived home, my mother was standing there with the tape in her hand. I quietly gulped as I awaited my Sonny Corleone/toll booth moment (we all know that feeling). She was not pleased. She began to unload on me with a series of questions that matched the rapid velocity of a Gatling gun. Instead of fully getting into the details of the exchange**, I will just let you know that the tape was destroyed like an appetite that day.

As time marched on, so did my journey through the rigors of school life. In grade 8, I really got into Aerosmith’s Get a Grip album. I thought ‘Livin’ on the Edge’ and ‘Amazing’ were the epitome of music (I was wrong).

As a result, I started to ask around about possibly obtaining copies of their other albums (without actually purchasing them, of course-No job=no money). I remember a guy on my baseball team was also a big fan. Having no currency, I needed to obtain these albums without actually proving to him that I really needed them. I would go off on my love for the band, but would nonchalantly state how I had yet to purchase their previous albums, and how I would love to do so in the near future. The trap was set, and conveniently, he stepped right into it with the speed of a 1988 Ben Johnson.

Friend: “Oh, I own those albums. I could tape them for you if you want”.

Me: “That would be awesome” (Internally-“Excellent, the plan has worked…now for the fail safe”), “but the only thing is that I don’t have any blank tapes, I will have to get you some the next time I see you”.

Friend: “Oh, don’t worry about that, I have plenty”.

Me: “That’s really cool of you” (Internally-“Score!”) (Hey, not the proudest moment of my life, but I needed to get my fix-any of you would have done the same!)

So, he went off and taped for me 1987’s Permanent Vacation and 1989’s Pump, which I received the next week at baseball practice. I thanked him repeatedly for helping me to expand my musical library***. At first, the albums spoke to me on a transcendental level but, of course, tastes change and after a few weeks, like most adolescent crushes, I lost interest in the aging Bostonians by the time I got to high school.

Other notable bands/musicians/songs from Junior High that impacted my musical appreciation were Blind Melon (‘No Rain’), Counting Crows (‘Mr. Jones’, ‘Round Here’), Duran Duran (‘Come Undone’, ‘Ordinary World’), Lenny Kravitz (‘Are You Gonna Go my Way’, ‘Believe’), Pearl Jam (‘Alive’, ‘Black’, ‘Even Flow’, ‘Jeremy’), Soul Asylum (‘Runaway Train’), Spin Doctors (‘Little Miss Can’t Be Wrong’, ‘Two Princes’), and Stone Temple Pilots (‘Creep’, ‘Plush’).

*To be honest, though, I was only slightly intrigued

**You know the scenario- She talks, I stammer some sort of lacklustre excuse

***Albeit, without me personally aiding the band financially. And upon deeper thought, I believe the only album that was a part of my library was Weird Al’s ‘Even Worse’ LP.

I have always desired to live the life of a rocker as I have always been intrigued with the reckless lifestyle associated with the job. I want to be believe in the stories, videos, and interviews that have come to define the very meaning of what rock n’ roll is about.

Here are my reasons for wanting to be a musical icon:

I enjoy waking up at noon.  After moments of contemplating my epic awesomeness to the surrounding world, I stagger out of bed (leaving some unidentified girl behind in it), spy my bottle of Jack Daniels through my dazed perception, take a swig from it, and then walk to the bathroom mirror and smile at it knowing that I am adored by millions simply because I can strum a guitar.

I enjoy wearing clothes that don’t match. I want to wear what I want, when I want (A tie with jogging pants-boo yah!). My style is my own. While the minions march off to work each day in their uniforms for “the man”, I enjoy throwing on whatever may be lying on the floor of whatever room I find myself waking up in. No matter what I wear, it will be deemed influential and fashionable. I will start a trend, no matter how overly flamboyant my wardrobe is*.

I desire to walk down the street with a swagger that threatens the personal space of others. I write and record music, therefore allowing me the privilege to do as I please. I strut because musical composition defines me as better than everyone else, including teachers, doctors, lawyers, and parents**.

I once had a job where I was threatened with suspension for not cutting my hair. I had to shave every day, and had to maintain a professional look that didn’t frighten (horrify) the people that frequented my place of employment.  As a rock star, I can roll out of bed and fashion my Robert Smith***do for the day (or a 1997 Keith Flint look-depends on what mood I’m trying to sell to the masses)****, because in the end, it doesn’t really matter how I look. My style of locks will create a stir, cause a sensation, and will eventually be copied by thousands of adoring fans. I will never be ridiculed, only admired for my individualistic integrity

I am immune to health disorders (unless it’s too many drugs, which is still deemed as acceptable by rock star standards). I can drink, smoke, and womanize. These actions are deemed detrimental to normal folk, but not rock stars, because the rock star is defined by his level of party. Society doesn’t look down upon my actions; they instead look up at me with enviable admiration. The public does not want Justin Bieber’s, they want Robert Plant’s (Going the Jim Morrison or John Bonham route ruins the fun, though you are still considered cool).  I must show society how it’s done since they don’t have the financial freedom to live like a rock star. In the end, it’s about the image, and the rock god (a.k.a. me) learns to glorify it to no end.

“I enjoy travelling. I want to see the world. Hmm, what to do? Let’s see, I can sing a few notes. Hey, look at that, I got a record deal. What’s that? You’re going to send me on a world tour paid for by the record label? Let me get this straight? You’re going to pay for all of my flights (private jet, of course), hotels, booze, and food. And you are going to pay me a salary on top of that? And all I have to do is sing and play guitar for an hour and a half? Maybe do some interviews (but I can be withdrawn and inarticulate-this way, people will think that I’m mysteriously cool with an enigmatic twist, and journalists will struggle for years attempting to figure me out), but other than that, I can sight see and experience the world? Or I can stay at home, work a 9 to 5 job, fight the traffic every day, and be bored with life? Hmm, I’ll take the former”.

Women will love me without even really knowing me. Normally, women wouldn’t give me the time of day, but wait a minute, I’m now holding a guitar in my hands. I have instantaneously become a rebellious, social misfit who oozes sexual machismo. Women now adore me, desire me, and worship the ground I walk upon (I know this to be true because of my past experiences with rock musicians. I was at a concert a few years ago, and the lead singer asked that all the women scream for him. They concurred to his wish). Women love me, men want to be me.

Anger, bitterness, addiction, loneliness, and eventual rehabilitation have all become attributes of the rebellious rock star. Rather than viewed as evil undoings, though, these issues simply become content for my future albums. I grow as a result, because I have persevered and overcome my vices. I may spend some time in jail for certain addictions, but not like “normal” people arrested on the same charges***** . It becomes a redemptive story that needs to be shared through song. And everyone will continue to love me for it, because I have evolved as an artist.

A rock star doesn’t create the buzz; he is the buzz.

Rock n’ Roll; need I say more?